Today marks the 20th anniversary of my marriage. Reflecting on our journey, I’ve realized that a successful relationship isn’t always a 50/50 split. Sometimes, one partner gives more than the other in certain areas, but it’s about balancing the scale over time. I believe we have successful done so
Here are some lessons I’ve learned:
Prioritize family: Include both sides of the family in your lives. Build strong relationships with your partner’s family. You will need them, and they you.
Maintain a sense of humor: Laughter is essential for any relationship. Find ways to inject humor and lightheartedness into your daily lives. When things are going less than ideal, “Let’s send in the clowns“.
Continue to grow: Encourage each other’s personal growth and aspirations. Remember that your passions may differ.
Communicate effectively: Express gratitude, appreciation, and understanding through open and honest communication. While not always easy to do, it’s essential.
Set boundaries: Remove toxic relationships or relatives from your life, if necessary, to create a healthier environment.
Spend quality time together: Prioritize quality time to maintain a strong emotional bond.
Celebrate milestones: Celebrate special occasions to strengthen your connection.
Accept imperfections: A successful marriage is about accepting and living with your partner’s flaws.
Give each other space: Allow your partner to have their interests and space. You are individuals, not the same person.
Support each other’s dreams: Be your partner’s biggest cheerleader and help them achieve their goals. Be less critical of them.
Keep romance alive: Surprise each other with gestures of love (sometimes yummy snacks), plan date nights, and create opportunities for continued intimacy, especially when you have children.
Maintain a work-life balance: Establish clear boundaries between work and personal life. Trust me, I’ve learned from multiple mistakes here.
Prioritize self-care: Take care of yourself to be the best version of yourself for your partner and children. As I all too often shout around our home “Who’s gonna carry the boats?”
Find joy in everyday moments: Enjoy raising your children together and create lasting memories.
Work as a team: Share household chores and responsibilities. Like the relationship, it will not be a 50/50 split.
Just some of what we have done to enable us to to build a strong and enduring marriage. Remember, it’s a journey, and there will be ups and downs along the way.
To my wife Nicole. I love you, and would not be the man I am today without you and our family. – Thank You, Jermal